And Gutenberg Lived Here: What On Earth Happened To All The Eggs?

Spring is sprung,

the grass is riz,

time to look for where

the Easter stuff is.


It’s that time of year again.

And Gutenberg Land is no different from anywhere else


Yesterday we did the usual Easter shopping thing-

clothes, socks, underwear,

hey, when you’ve got a man along,

and he has finally agreed to go clothes shopping,

you do what you have to do.

So there we were-

at one of the large downtown  department stores-

after taking the “happy train”-

the small gauge connector

with cutouts of tv cartoon figures on the sides,

that carries the thirty thousand plus students to classes,

and every one else to early morning senior citizen 2 halves of a hard roll

smeared with jam or cheese or raw pork hamburger with onions,

and coffee,

for under 5 dollars,

or those,

like us,

to shopping.

Hey,  when you have family in the States

expecting boxes of German Easter candy-

chocolate in the shape of everything from wart hogs-

hey, never heard of the Easter fertility wart hog?

to high-heeled slippers,

computer keyboards,

the transformers,

and even some in the shape of Eggs,

which weren’t selling nearly as well as the chess set,

you buy a large postal box,

and fill ‘er up.

At least partially-

the stuff is good quality,

and not really cheap.

then, after buying the smeary jell-o-like color sticks,

and the stringy green super thin licorice

that looks like Easter basket grass,

drinking two cups of coffee,

to up the morale,

not to mention getting the brain functioning again,

you avoid the pink fuzzy bunny underwear,

and men’s briefs with tiny little rabbits everywhere,

some of them doing things,

like those Kama Sutra charts you see in cheap book stores,

and buy…


(The underwear will have to keep till after Easter-

did I mention underwear,

and especially nylons for women

are a favorite Easter gift over here?)

And this,

the Egg hunt,

before anyone has actually hidden them,

is the real reason you have to do the Easter shopping run for your life-

Namely, all white eggs,

that can be actually colored without coming out grey,

have been reserved,

at our bio chicken raiser down the road from us.

Yeah, yeah, so I sort of forgot it again-

hey, who thinks of reserving eggs-

and strawberries,

and whte asparagus,

if you do the Easter thing German style,

in the middle of February.

(so they know how many fields to plant,

since both strawberries

and white asparagus,

are high water, high amount of work needed to pick and harvest,

what with going out every day to put dirt on the asparagus sprouts,

so they don’t turn green,

or purple,

under the sunlight.)

So anyway,

to make a long story short,

after a full day of walking-

10 kilometers on our meter,

we now have:

put the Easter boxes in the mail,

no new underwear,

two boxes of white un-bio eggs

which probably means fed with plastic grasshoppers,

a thumping heart

from the next two cups of coffee,

and the sweet potato fries with hot curry sauce for lunch,

an egg nog filled chocolate egg for the love of my life,

a new plastic watch band,

for our pedometer,


no new Easter clothes.

Hey, after all these years as a conductor,

I’ll just pull out something from the black suit and pants section of the closet,

and try to get it dry cleaned before Easter.

Hey, and I thought conducting Bach’s St John’s Passion was hard work.

copyright 2017

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